Here’s what I chanced upon..

“After 30 years, women have made tremendous strides – strides most of us would be loath to give up. But perhaps it’s time to ask an important question: Not, “Are women succeeding on an equal basis with men?” but “Are today’s women happy?” … http://www.boundless.org/1999/departments/pages/a0000123.html

It’s true what this article says about the conventional idea of feminism and how it has somehow managed to worsen the lives of women. Essentially- feminism is a “system” too with a pre-defined set of rules. Earlier women lived their lives according to what the scriptures or the society at large preached. They followed rules set by society and its masters and gave up their personal dreams and pleasures to achieve the socially accepted definition of the “ideal woman”.

The only thing that changed with feminism is the rules that they were supposed to follow. There still exist a long list of “Dos and Don’ts” – except that its contents have changed. In earlier times – they were expected to stay at home and look after the family; whereas now- they’re expected to have careers and beat men at their own games. They struggle to have careers, tirelessly compete with men to “prove that they’re better”. They are always out to prove a point – often giving up what they truly want. They feel guilty about love, about relationships. They don’t want to admit to their vulnerabilities and keep working at being superwomen.

Feminism has changed nothing. True liberation would come only with the power to think. It would come only when women have the conviction to decide what they want out of their lives irrespective of what is expected of them – and with the strength to see their decisions through. It would come when a woman who wants to give up a high flying career to spend time with her family will no longer be questioned. It would come only when women are allowed to just be themselves and not asked to chase a dream that someone else has dreamt for them. If they want a high flying career, they should have the liberty, opportunity and resources to make that a reality and be proud of their achievements. But if they don’t want to go out and make the mega bucks and be back home everyday before the husband and kids – they should be able to do so with pride and dignity – sans any guilt and regret at having compromised on their talents and ability!